Wednesday, September 30, 2015

Out of Dodge

After a botched heist, Mole leadfoots it out of there, with Toad bleeding all over the backseat next to Badger and Rat riding shotgun. None of them really knows what went wrong, just that there were a lot more people in the shop than they reckoned with and,more importantly, a lot more serious firepower.

Toad has managed to grab a bag that he says contains the gold. The others are sceptical and after some bickering, Badger grabs the bag and opens it. It contains coins, Reichsmark to be exact. Not the loot they were hoping for and nothing they can sell quickly. Toad begs them to take him to a doctor and Mole says that they’ll cross the river first to get some more miles between them and the crime scene, then they’ll just put a gun to the head of the next doctor they find.

Badger comes up with another idea: how about they ask the Afghan, you know, Mole, that guy who bought all that heroin from us that time? Mole stops the car and turns on Badger. „We don’t fucking talk about the Afghan! You know I want nothing to do with that guy! Apologise or we can sit here all day, fine by me.“

Badger not only doesn’t apologise, she cannot fucking believe that Mole still has a chip on his shoulder about the Afghan. „Come on, the guy can help us! He’ll give us a good price for the coins AND he’ll have a doctor for Toad. Hands up everyone who’s for the Afghan.“ Two hands go up in the backseat, Rat’s undecided and Mole is pissed off, but at least starts driving again.

„Okay. Here’s an idea, how about we go to Prague?“ Badger almost punches Mole at hearing this. „Prague? Are you out of your mind, we can’t go back to Prague! I don’t even want to THINK about Prague. Man, I never puked so hard in my life, what were you thinking doing THAT to the guy in OUR hotel room? Fuck Prague.“

Toad interrupts the discussion by dying noisily and in agony. That solves the doctor problem, but not the problem of where to go and adds the problem of where to put the body. Another problem is that the ferry won’t leave for some time. Still, they take a break at the small harbour, Mole goes for a smoke and the three people left in the car start to wonder if there might be a rat among them. Everyone looks at Rat. „Jeez, guys, it’s a codename!“ It does nothing for their peace of mind that Badger recognises a car that she thinks she has seen at the jewellery story. They drive off again and Rat really starts to dig into Badger, harping on how it was her contact who came up with the idea for the heist.

Mole tells her to check Toad, to see if he’s wired. Badger does that, pulls Toad’s gun and shoots Rat in the head, splattering the windshield with blood and brains. Mole almost drives the car off the road. „You cannot shoot people while I’m driving! Couldn’t you have waited until we pull over again?“ Badger isn’t very sorry for what she did. „That guy got on my nerve.“ On cue, they encounter a parade of five tractors, driving very slowly. There is no way they can have missed all that blood. Five hundred metres down the road, there’s the annual firefighter festival, with even more people and, of course, firefighters and police.

Mole takes a desperate turn to get off that particular road and fairly quickly, he no longer has any idea where they are headed. „We’re NOT lost,I just don’t know where we are going!“ With only the two of them in the car, talk turns to Mole’s therapy (he no longer goes and may or may not have killed his psychiatrist), bickering about Prague and the Afghan („We don’t fucking talk about…“) and the realisation that it might be a good time to take a break from each other.

Mole makes a stop at a small dirt track to give them a chance to hide the two bodies in the boot of the car. He takes his pistol because he’s not an idiot and has a bad feeling about Badger, but she still gets the drop on him and he goes down with a bullet to the head. Badger takes a deep breath, enjoys the quiet for a moment and then realises that she’s standing next to a car with three bodies, with rubbish coins for loot, that she cannot drive and is in the middle of nowhere. She can only hope that the Afghan will make good on his promise.


And that was our game of Out of Dodge. For me (Badger),it really picked up speed when the Afghan was brought into play. He immediately turned into the Keyser Soyze-figure and suddenly, Mole and Badger had a past together.

The way the game works is that everyone has a keyword they are supposed to work into the conversation. That word is a prompt for one of the others to say or do something specific. If anyone dies, they can still play – sniping the conversation with suggestions like: don’t you think she will betray you? Wasn’t Mole supposed to be in therapy for that? Didn’t work out or what?.

The timing of me shooting Rat and the tractor parade was flawless. Mole had just said: ‘people will see all that blood!’ when they came into view and they would have had to have been blind indeed to miss the blood if this had been real.

It’s not strictly neccessary, but we took nerf guns along for the ride, without ammo, and that made for some extra realism. Please do not wave fake guns around where people can get nervous about it. Also a nice surprise: Mr Ook had switched our generic fake coins to real Reichsmark without telling me - I had asked him to prepare the props and character envelopes because I didn’t want to spoil myself.

So, if you’ve got a car, three friends and some time on your hand, go play this. It’s hilarious and there are no rules to learn, just: improvise. Don’t be afraid to make a mess of the situation…what AM I saying, the situation IS already a mess. Roll with it.